You know you where brought up in Newcastle Upon Tyne if....

I KNOW THE NAME IS SPELT WRONG. IF BAD GRAMMER AND SPELLING BUGS YOU - TOUGH!! I CAN'T CHANGE IT AND DON'T SEND ME A MESSAGE TELLING ME, WHERE IS SPELT WERE!!

You know you were brought up in Newcastle if....

You knew girls who wore Bobby Anne boots.

You had a Naff Naff jacket.

You had a Sweater shop jumper.

You had a pair of Eclipse jeans from Geordie Jeans.

You remember being able to go to the top of monument.

You remember when the Quayside was horrible.

You remember taking the piss out of your mates if they were wearing dodgy gear with the line “Did you get that down the Quay”.

You were born in Princess Mary’s hospital.

You remember when you could go on a ride at the Moor for 50p.

You were excited about the Moor.

You remember when a guy was able to sell 5 lighters for a pound outside Eldon Square.

You crowded round your mates Chronicle ‘Gutted’ when Andy Cole was sold to Man United.

You remember when Charva’s where called Trevor’s and Sharon’s.

You used to pray to god your Mother would not be spotted with a Netto bag.

You used to go on family days out to Jesmond Dene – Big fucking deal!

Going to pets corner was like going on a safari.

You started drinking in pubs at 15, you never looked back.

You went down the coast everyday in the summer holidays.

You used to jump off the shit excuse for a pier at Cullercoats.

You remember when hopping the Metro was easy.

You remember when the High Level bridge was unwrapped.

You remember when St James was a total shit hole.

You had a pair of British Knights or LA Gear.

You went through a strage period of calling your Mam, Ma & your Dad, Da!?!

You remember when there was not a Gregg's on every fucking street.

You remember when HMV was Mark One and before that a massive toy shop.

You don't call old eldon square, old eldon square. You call it Hippy Green.

You went to The Ritzy.

Your family use to think you were gay because you went to Rockshotts.

You don't remember what was there, before The Centre of Life.

You went to the old World Headquarters which was about the size of a three bedroomed flat.

You KNOW stotties are the best bread in the word.

You know the Grove is not in Byker.

You fake laugh when Southerners say "Spuggie Man!" thinking they are being original.

You lined the streets when Newcastle LOST the FA Cup finals.

You go away for a while and when you cross over the Tyne and see the Tyne bridge you feel all nostalgic.

You understand words like Shan, Lajful, Raji and Doylem.

You worked at or knew someone that worked at either The Inland Revenue in Longbenton,National Rail Enquiries or Orange at the Silverlink.

You won't travel on the dodgy Metro line. Wallsend, Meadow Well, Percy Main.

You heard rumours about someone going down the Tornado at wet and wild head first.

You went round the Lazy River at wet and wild and your inflatable ring got carried outside in the middle of fucking winter.

You remember when Charva's had sensible names like Micky, Wayne or Nicola. Not Mason, Shania or Keegan.

Going to Fenwicks and not going to the third floor, was like going to a Chinese and ordering an omlette.

You know the Metro Centre is NOT a tourist attraction ENGLISH TOURISTS: THE METRO CENTRE HAS THE SAME SHOPS AS YOUR OWN INDOOR SHOPPING CENTRES AND THE SAME SHOPS AS YOUR HIGH STREET.

You don't give a flying fuck about that Multi Story Carpark that was in 'Get Carter'. Knock the bastard down it's and eyesore. No-one even parks there!?!?!

You have driven past the Civic Centre on a Saturday and the women of your family have gone. ' There's a wedding on'. Followed by 'Ah! thats nice'.......the blokes don't give a shit.

You watched a U2 tribute band play beside the civic centre on the eve of the Millenium.

You are not a child...your a bairn.

You went down Jesmond Dene to get conkers, but some one had beaten you too it. I am sure some kids camped out like it was a fucking Next sale!

You watched a pantomime with Brendan Fucking Healy in it, usually at that Theatre on Westgate Road. Because the Theatre Royal got real stars - like Bobby Davro.

You met Mike Neville.

You had and possibly still do have a crush on Wendy Gibson.

You took your sledge on that massive hill on the Town Moor.

You remember reading about some bloke in the Ronnie-Gill who had got a Tattoo of Kevin Keegan or Andy Cole the day before they fucked off.

You were impressed by the shite Rollercoaster at Metro-land.

If you where naughty you never got threatened with a smack. You got threatened with a Braying - "If you run out in the road i am going to bray you".

Going through the Tyne Tunnel was really fucking exciting.

You went through the pedestrian Tyne Tunnel on your bike.

IF YOU PLAN ON USING THIS AS A PLACE TO ADVERTISE STUPID SHIT THAT PEOPLE HAVE ZERO INTEREST IN. DO YOURSELF A MASSIVE FAVOUR AND DON'T. NOBODY CARES ABOUT RUNNING THEIR CAR ON WATER!! PETROL IS FINE!! NOBODY WANTS TO APPEAR IN A PROGRAMME WITH HESTON "FUCKING" BLUMENTHAL, HE'S ORANGE AND ANNOYING AS FUCK. NOBODY WANTS TO SIGN UP FOR VIP TREATMENT AT SOME SHIT BAR LIKE APARTMENT. PLEASE DON'T WRITE ANYTHING ON THE WALL THAT IS NOT TO DO WITH THE SUBJECT OF THIS GROUP. IF YOU DO I WILL JUST FUCKING DELETE IT, BECAUSE I AM A PROPER MISRABLE BASTARD!!

Think this is funny? This is pure genius.

http://www.theburglarsdog.co.uk/