- Wolverhampton -

Wolverhampton... its the not the most glamourous place is it. But when do you know youv'e been a wulfrunian (someone native of Wolverhampton) for too long these tell tall signs may help.

* You say 'You am' instead of 'You are'
* You use the word 'Fucking' when thinking of the next word of your sentance. E.g 'I saw John the other day he was erm... fucking... out with bob down.... fucking... bingo
* You use 'The Man on the Horse' or McDonalds as the central point of gathering when shopping in town
*You barely batter an eye lid at football violence and your'e almost certain to know someone associated with it.
* People from Birmingham are known as 'Brummy Bastard's'
* You have participated in or seen the St Peter's fountain full of bubble bath
* You recognise Wolverhampton as shit for a night on the town but your'e garanteed to be up there on a saturday
* Talking of clubbing you know that Chicago's and New York New York are grab a granny
* Major's chip shop, Bilston is the best chips in the world
* You only go to Walsall for something to do on a sunday morning
* You know Heath Town needs blowing up LOL
* You wonder what happened to the black guy who preached every saturday in the city centre
* Depending on what story you belive 'The Tramp on the ring-road' is a polish refugee that has cable paid for him and dosen't have to pay counclil tax.
* Talking about psychos youve had a pointless conversation with 'The Cowboy man'.
* Youv'e been asked once by some twat at the bustop or money because his Mrs kicked him out and he has no money
* You know that if it wasn't for the cheap Kebab shops, Broad street would be pointless.
* You know the price of 'Lazzeez's' keababs and pizzas
*You know that Tettenhall is full of posh tarts that only go clubbing in wolverhampton to shag someone who owns a tracksuit
* You automatically sing 'Wolverhampton' when 'Hi-Ho silver lining is played at a disco'
* We were brought up to hate anything from West Bromich - Ay IT!
* You know that catching the train to Birmingham is better than the metro as it dont break down half as much.
* You recognise that Primark is chav central but bloody great for hoodys
* You know that our train station is planning disaster from the 70's
* We say were Black Country but were not, were part of it, but were not in it!
* We only use Telford for Ice skating
* Despite being a city, we still get shocked if get mentioned on the news or a tv programme.
* You know that Whitmore Reans is 'drive by' central
* You know that if you want a hooker spend 5 minutes in All-saints and youll get one
* You know that people from Walsall hate us.. but no-one gives a shit about walsall.
* You know the civic centre is for pensioners,skaters and imigrants.
*You're not happy that Iraqis are in our city but £3 for a wash and dry on your car it could be Osama Bin Laden washing it for that price
* Asda is a war zone on the weekend for middle ages moms with trolleys
* You remember where you were when Mark Kennedy scored the first goal when the wolves got promoted
* St Peters church is the place to sunbathe when its sunny
* You belive the Express and Star no matter what shit they write.
* You know that Cineworld is cheapest on Tuesdays
* Everyone was born at New Cross.. well almost everyone
* You know that if your'e lost outside Wolverhampton just look for the Blue neon lights on top of Mander House to find your way home.
* Every taxi driver is friendly but an utter twat
* When was the last time you heard someone say 'Im moving to Ettingshall'?
* You know that weatherspoons is full of Dole dossers
* You know that Blackpool could quite easily be 'Wolverhampton-on-sea'
* Who remembers when Goodyears was a factory and not a restaurant
* Youve been to the Imperial at least once
* Chavs hate trendies, trendies hate gangster rappers, gangster rappers hate emo, and emo's hate everyone but garanteed you have friends from at least one of those groups.
* We have the worst Christmas lights in the world
* We hate to admit it but we would love to nick Birmingham's big screen from Chamberlain Sq.

but most of all, you know your'e from wolverhampton if you agree with more than half these things